Hi.

This is my first post on a blog I newly created. Blogs used to be my means of escapism. After a long day at school I would go online and just jot down my feelings on their e-journal. The original intention of getting into blogging was to assimilate into my teenage/adolescent society where the popular kids own blogs. Looking past the popularity, the blog now holds some of my most intimate thoughts. It is quite ironic that the most public place (the internet) would be where my most private affairs are buried. I can't risk my family or friends chancing upon my diary or notebook in reality, so here I am.

I'm currently in the midst of my A level examinations. I'm writing this because I have no idea who I am. It may seem like a common problem for teenagers especially, and I'm finally entrenched in this search for my identity. A teacher once thought me that we determine our lives and actions through our identity. Unless we finally establish an identity for ourselves, we are unable to take responsibility or maximise our potential.

I need help. I don't know who I am and it scares me. I have no idea of what my true purpose in life is or what my special abilities are. I have conflicting goals now in the sense that it is difficult for me to achieve both. But if I pass up the opportunity to do one, the opp cost is high.

Psychologist
Idol

What if I'm unable to achieve both? Am I ready to leave my family and forge it out on my own?

Part French polynesian
Part Peranakan
Part Chinese

How do I embrace the different parts of me to create a unique and wonderful individual